Friday, March 30, 2007

BEWARE! Women, nonbelievers and general idiots...


Attention to all women, Atheists, impoverished, mentally retarded and Christians! You have no Neshma. The road to heaven is not open to you. You are ALL GOING TO HELL. According to the Kabbalists that is. Sound crazy? Let me explain my outburst, and when I'm finished I would GREATLY appreciate your feedback, as it will help me write an essay due in May. (Thank you in advance).
Today in my Jewish Mysticism and Kabbalah class we discussed the human soul. I am aware of how Christians and Atheists view the soul, even vaguely the traditional Jewish view but this was new to me and I found it extremely interesting. There is a long back story involving Adam (surprisingly not so much Eve) and the original sin. Long story short, we are not inherently born with the divine part of the soul called the Neshma, but have to earn it. Unfortunately having this said Neshma is the only ticket into heaven. Even more alarming, attaining this Neshma is not very easy. First off you must follow the commandments.... this is broad umbrella. Second off you must know the Torah front to back. This counts out the Christians, unless they convert. This counts out women and the poor (keeping in mind antiquity). The Torah was written by Rabbis who more than likely did not want these people in heaven, and fortunately enough these populations did not have access to the Torah. BUT, you not only had to know the Torah in its entirety, but know the mystical meaning behind all the passages, and the Sefirotic context of the commandments. This got me thinking, this isn't very fair. What if you are too dumb to get it? What if you are smart, but not good at interpretation? Does this mean the mentally retarded have the same status as the animals? Than again, the idea of an elite heaven isn't so exotic. Many faiths believe non believers and animals don't get into heaven. Can someone who is mentally retarded really believe? Or do they just clap their hands in church and follow the sheep?
I also found it interesting that the Kabbalists don't let you merely go through the actions of reading the Torah and obeying the Commandments. They actually have to delve in, understand what they believe. There are still Kabbalists , and of course the rules have broadened to let in more people, including the Hollywood wave. Is it o.k to mix the words of the ancient book the Kabbalists follow, to fit more people into heaven? Christians nitpick the words of the bible all the time. There will never be room in heaven for a Secularist like me. Thats fine, but I do feel sorry for my pet cats that have died, and all the little retards I work with.

1 comment:

neshma said...

well my names neshma and i;m catholic my dad named me ater it and he was catholic too.. now will i go to heaven...??? bum bum buummm screw the theories i'll believe in wat i like....